If you were to see me right now,
my shoes are screaming in a drunken voice that i belong on Jersey Shore.
If i were to give these shoes a name, i'd call them Cookie, or Bambi, or some equally trashy slut name. I feel the sudden need to purchase an Ed Hardy outfit.
FIST PUMP
I used to/still suffer from a severe shoe addiction. The only time I've ever been grounded in high school was when i lied to my parents about my whereabouts and went shoe shopping instead. it's that bad. When i was 16 i stumbled across a sale and made what i like to refer to now as the stupidest decision of my life i found
heels.
& i purchased them. yeah, i paid real money for those suckers.
anyone who's recovered from an addiction will tell you they had a "breaking point"
well i like to call those shoes rock bottom. I needed help.
ever since that dreadful day these awful shoes have sat in my closet, staring at me.
every. day.
even this guy would say "these shoes SUCK"
those shoes have never seen the light of day, and for good reason.
Despite my hatred for those disgusting things i couldn't throw them away, i look at that as defeat because if i throw them out, it means i couldn't put together an outfit that allowed me to attempt to pull off the lime green monstrosity that seemed to infect my other shoes with ugliness everyday they sat in there.
if you're keeping track of the timeline here, it's been 4 years since i bought these shoes.
and today is the day. i'm wearing them.
yeah, i'm at work. judge me why don't you.
i feel so filthy. i belong on a street corner. Good thing i work in downtown Ogden, so i guess i'm in the right atmosphere.
i almost drew on my eyebrows today to pull off the look of these shoes.
ugh. nastay.
the saddest part of the story, is that i actually feel accomplished about these shoes now that i've worn them. i thought that i may burn them now,
then i realized, wait. i'm bein snooki for halloween.
you can bet the house that i'll be wearin the lime green snakeskin heels.
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